dejected

its a really bitter way to take the pill but nevertheless i just had to swallowed it...this exam is really a wake up call for me for my preparations for my a2 exams...i know that i haven't gave my all for this exam and i hope that for this one month or so i will catch up on what i left out for my studies....maybe i shoudn't wait until the last minute...somehow or rather some things just don't go well for me....let me give a situation,i am interested in physics and longed to be an engineer before but i need a strong foundation in maths which i don't have it....so that career is well off my mind...i am also interested in food science but then my chemistry is practically hopeless...accounting perhaps??well, that will be the last thing on my mind!!!i am only stuck with a business related subject which i am stil searching...i think when the right time comes i think that will be d-day that i am finally enthusiatic on studying something that i truly love...i hope that when the time comes i will be passsionate on it and it will lead me to a greener life for years to come....now, i have made a vow on myself...erase this solemn chapter for this year...strive to improve myself...and work hard!!
When night falls and the stars filled the sky,i will be thinking that those stars resemble my highest aspiration..I may not reach them but I can look up and admire their beauty, believe in them, and try to make it happen...If i lose hope, somehow i know that i will lose the vitality that keeps life moving,i will lose that courage to be, that persistence and the courage that helps me go on in spite of it all. And so today I still have a dream...;]

dreams

it took a long time to upload the tgen website, and finally when it did an error came out!!imagine waiting there for so long, my hand was trembling, heart beating as if i ran 2km and an error came out..haihzz...guess i need to postpone it to another day..even though i haven't check yet, but my instinct tells me that the results ain't good...as always..~sigh~...if only things were better off for me,i wonder what it feels like to have good results..."will my mum stop nagging me to study and instead i will have the freedom to go out whenever i want??;will i have a scholarship that my parents will be proud of?..;will my friends come to me when they need a question to be answered??...will i be contented with the results i have but cursing myself for the careless mistakes i made that cost me my marks??;these are the few questions i ponder as I reflect myself if things changed for me...i rememeber a saying...:You see things; and you say, "Why?" But I dream things that never were; and I say, "Why not?.."this is my ultimate dream...Without leaps of imagination, or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities. Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning.
in reality, i think that is virtually impossible...but i have never once doubted my ability to achieve great heights..maybe one day it will happen to me, maybe it won't...but whatever the outcome is i am proud that i am optimistic and and this is what inspires me to carry on with my life without any regrets...Life can be found only in the present moment. The past is gone, the future is not yet here, and if we do not go back to ourselves in the present moment, we cannot be in touch with ourself...

maybe one day?

its been a long time since i last updated my blog...quite busy with exams and to make matters worse my comp got virus at the wrong time just when my holidays start...a2 trial exams was so tough,all those new topics for chemistry and physics..and my accounting was totally blown away..didn't know how to do a single thing at all, juz imagine objective questions and u shoot like 40% of the questions...haihzzz...the only bright spot is maths...compared to the beginning of the year where my maths was like completely hopeless and now it becomes one of the subject i am looking forward to score...i will end now of the exams part coz u won't want to know too much...haha...
i was thinking something when i watched the final episode of "moving on"...sometimes u feel u want a special someone in your life but u don''t know where to find it...but if u look glance at the side,the special someone is right there waiting for u to ask that simple question...how bizzarre is that dun you think?? bet some of you feel that way too...maybe if you just give it a try who knows??another thing i think maybe occurs to you and obviously occurs to me too...is that u know that she is right for you but u just don't have the guts to tell her those three words....and in the end she falls for another guy and you end up cursing yourself for it...if you just have the courage she will be yours forever!!
ok i think that all i have to write about...it may sound a bit boring...